When Realization Hits
by carnival-cafe
Summary: Still, waiting meant experiencing the heaviness of expectations that would only turn into disappointment—as morbid as it seemed yet that was what Yuri firmly believed and was afraid of despite the spitfire that raged underneath his very skin.


**When Realization Hits**

 **Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters in this story they belong respectfully to their original creators.

 **Warning:** Themes of shounen-ai/yaoi/homosexual relationships and whatever, you know all that good stuff, fluffy and also some mild OOC-ness…. If any of this bothers you then you have the option of not reading.

 **Music:** "Make you feel Loved" by Cade

 **A/N:** I was inspired by some of the images from the show's ending scenes but also the film 5 Centimeters per Second. I hope you enjoy this story, have fun reading!

X

X

Waiting was always a painful process for Yuri to endure. His mind couldn't help but associate waiting to the possibility of being disappointed and swallowed up by a shadow of loneliness. Like the absence of his mother's support during his practices and competitions. The lack of drive and skill his peers didn't have in comparison to him until Yuri was the only one marching to the beat of his own drum and everyone around him became nothing but competition in his eyes. And then there was Viktor's broken promise after he stopped attempting quads during his junior debut in exchange to be recognized for his skills and to be taught by the champion skater himself. Yuri supposed Viktor had in recent years, managed to rectify his actions, but the damage it had left behind still remained, unforgotten in the depths of Yuri's heart.

Still, waiting meant experiencing the heaviness of expectations that would only turn into disappointment—as morbid as it seemed yet that was what Yuri firmly believed and was afraid of despite the spitfire that raged underneath his very skin. And it was driving Yuri mad not to let himself feel so helpless and frustrated as he kept himself seated in the airports waiting area with anxiety fluttering in his stomach and crushing his lungs tightly.

Maybe it was his fault—the timing wasn't exactly perfect considering there was still snow in Hasetsu so it made sense for the travel from Kazakhstan to Japan to be delayed. And yet Yuri wanted to share this opportunity with Otabek more than anything—the chance for the both of them to train together with Viktor, if only briefly. For Yuri it'd been a surprise, a belated birthday present to him from both Viktor and Yuuri to come and stay with them and train at Ice Castle Hasetsu. It also meant that Viktor would have a hand in choreographing a short program for him again and then afterwards he would return to Russia to train under Yavok and Lilia for the remainder of his preparation for the next Grand Prix series. It was quite an arrangement, something even his grandfather Nikolia told him he couldn't pass up and with his encouragement, Yuri had flown to Hasetsu.

Truthfully, it'd been Yuko's idea to extend the same invitation to Otabek, but of course he had to get everyone else's permission which surprisingly they were fine with if not more ecstatic than Yuri was of having the hero of Kazakhstan in Hasetsu. Still, traveling was easier said than done and even though Otabek had accepted the offer—the waiting was still strenuous on Yuri's part.

The last time Yuri had checked, Otabek had been in the process of boarding his plane and from there communication had been cut off once he took off into the air. Yuri didn't want to miss the off chance of making the older skater wait any longer than he had to. Being the stubborn brat he was despite having freshly turned eighteen, he went to the airport to wait for the last half of Otabek's travel time and in the process had dragged Viktor and Yuuri as well as the Nishigouri's along with him.

Axel, Lutz and Loop had managed to distract him during the first few hours or so with their choice in YouTube videos and being dragged around the gift shops and food court. They pointed at anything and everything that interested them and Yuri had been taken along for the adventure. But after circling around the airport for the fourth time, Yuri's patience began to lack its luster and he returned to his seat next to Yuuri with a scowl. Hiroko Katsuki had been kind enough to send a few bento boxes with them to make the waiting bearable but even then, Yuri wasn't hungry and left his portion of katsudon untouched.

Yuri's resolve to stay calm was faltering though he did his best to not let it show on his face. As usual, he fiddled with his phone, scrolling down through his Instagram feed whilst ignoring his surroundings. From the looks of things, Guang-Hong was in America visiting Leo, Phichit was taking selfies at the market which Yuri rolled his eyes at and he internally gushed at the sight of Christophe's cat once it came up. There was Emil posing on the slopes with a snowboard by his side, Mila weight lifting at the gym and then Georgi on a date with his girlfriend at some fancy restaurant dressed up in a suit and tie. Yuri continued to scroll down on auto pilot, taking in each and every image that loaded up until he nearly missed a painted sunset taken by Phichit in Bangkok. It wasn't a selfie but it certainly resonated enough that it made Yuri stop and stare at the blue and yellowing skies that engulfed the horizon line of Thailand's capital.

The thought of Barcelona instantly came to mind, and Yuri made a quiet noise of embarrassment as memories of the day he first became friends with Otabek returned to him at full force. Now that he considered it, that day had by all means been romantic though he would loath to admit it out loud to anyone.

He'd been pursued by hordes of rabid fangirls until he'd been pushed into a near inescapable corner. When he thought all hope would be lost, he'd been shocked out of his mind to be rescued by a man on a motorcycle. He would find out later in the day that that said man was his competitor but he'd had never forgotten about him for years since their first encounter at a training camp. And it was all because of his fiery disposition as a child, determined to make his mark on the ice—it was like a modern fairy tale come true, Yuri supposed. Well, the rescuing aspect but over all that day had left a remarkable impression that he would never forget and he still remained Otabek's friend since.

Biting his bottom lip, Yuri searched for Otabek's account on the app and finding his gallery, he felt his heart slowly begin to quicken at each image he saw. The older skater didn't upload nearly as many photos as Yuri did due to his disdain for social media but the images he did share were meaningful in a way Yuri understood better than anyone. The view of Almaty from his window, a casual drive on his Harley, the occasional stray cat that he would personally tag Yuri to and the ice rink where he practiced his routines… And when Yuri came to the image of Otabek and him from the last time they'd met up in person at the Grand Prix Finals, his heart just about melted at the softness Otabek displayed next to him. While Yuri was glowing with smugness twinkling in his eyes, Otabek's was much gentler in comparison. The contrast was as plain as day and yet to Yuri, their picture together looked perfect and he couldn't help but let himself smile tenderly.

Of course Yuri couldn't enjoy a moment of quiet reminiscing to himself and Yuuri, much to the blonde's dismay was the first to notice the change in his demeanor.

"Oh, you two look nice there!" Yuuri said suddenly, his voice breaking Yuri's personal bubble of tranquility like a needle. "They look good together, don't they Viktor?"

"I couldn't agree more!" The older man chimed like a fool looking at the photo on Yuri's screen and yet his expression changed even faster than his response. "However there's a part of me that feels like I need to pull Otabek aside for a talk once he arrives. Yurio, you wouldn't mind if I stole him from you for a few minutes, right?"

"You've got to be kidding me?!" Yuri exclaimed, his jaw hanging open as he stared appalled by the couple next to him.

Yuuri, to his horror actually nodded his head in agreement with his partner. "If that's what you plan to do, at least be nice to him, Viktor. We don't want to scare him back to Kazakhstan. After all, he's going to be our guest for a while."

Viktor laughed, waving his hand in dismissal. "I know, I know—don't worry about it. Besides, look at him." He pointed. "I think he can handle himself against me. Though I do hope I leave a strong impression. We can't have him breaking our precious Yurio's heart."

Instantly Yuri recoiled, pressing the phone protectively against his chest in an effort to shield the picture on his screen from them. "Do you even hear yourselves?!" He yelled. "You're nuts, and if you're implying that we're something more than friends, we're not like that!" Yuri screamed the words out at the top of his lungs but upon realizing what he had spat out in impulse, he stopped immediately after to reconsider them, becoming quiet in the process.

The change in Yuri was drastic, too obvious to not go unnoticed and Yuuri looked between him and Viktor, worried at what the cause of his distress could be. Watching Yuri carefully, Viktor, it seemed, had a much better understanding than Yuuri did and stood up suddenly, surprising his partner in the process. With silent determination, Viktor took the blond by the wrist, pulling him up to his feet and no sooner the pair disappeared beyond the waiting area to talk in private. Although his worry didn't dissipate into thin air, Yuuri felt certain that Viktor would be able to help Yuri and hoped for the best… it was about time those two learned to talk civilly once in a while and maybe this was their chance, he thought.

X

X

Yuri allowed himself to be led towards the other side of the building. They were far away from prying eyes and familiar faces that would be tempted to eavesdrop on them and he appreciated the attempt of having a private conversation. As soon as they stopped, and Viktor settled for leaning his back flat against the nearest wall, Yuri went to stand next to him, his footsteps heavy, much like the weight in his chest.

Standing in silence, side by side for what seemed like an eternity, Yuri finally sighed in defeat, drained. "What do you want, Viktor?"

The older man hummed softly, closing his eyes for a moment while putting extra thought into his next words. "I feel as though I should be the one asking you what's been on your mind this entire time we've been waiting for your friend." He replied before turning towards him, concern evident in the way he looked at Yuri. "Or maybe I should have been a little noisier when you first asked us if Otabek Altin could train with you."

Yuri stiffened, his lips pouting but he said nothing and Viktor chuckled softly at his childish display. Some things never changed, and it was a treat to see that deep down, no matter how old he was, the so called ice tiger of Russia was still a kitten at heart.

Seeing as Yuri had nothing else he would willingly offer, Viktor continued to speak. "I was surprised the first time I noticed how close the two of you were but I didn't say anything because seeing you happy, seeing how much you changed was enough for me to go on believing that you would be alright. But now, it looks like somethings changed, hasn't it?"

"I don't know…" Yuri mumbled at first, looking down at his feet. "Or maybe, I do know but I don't know how to express it…"

"When you put it that way, it reminds me of the time when I first introduced you to skating to Agape, ne?" Viktor asked, a knowing smiling gracing his lips.

Immediately, Yuri pushed himself off the wall, mouth opening, ready to start spitting out fire like a raging volcano but no words came out, his mind too blank and too lost to even think about what to say in retaliation. Even as he tried to glare, it was no use and he slumped back against the wall—diffused and exhausted. However, he felt himself unable to stand any longer, his body slowly falling down until his butt was sat firmly to the ground. In his silence, Viktor observed him, sighing quietly before sitting down next to the blond and crossing his legs.

"So, it looks like I've hit the nail in the coffin, huh?"

"Don't get so smug just because you made the perfect comparison to what I'm feeling right now. I swear I'll bite you old man…" Yuri grumbled but the threat was stale and even Viktor thought his tone was harmless in comparison to his past extortions.

"Agape, unconditional love…" Viktor said, still smiling, the warmth reaching his blue eyes and shimmering under the florescent lights above them. "God's infinite love is self-sacrificing and uncalculating—I told you this once before."

"And just like back then, it still gives me a headache trying to interpret your gross crap about love…" Yuri groaned.

"Really? A heartache makes much better sense than a headache though, don't you think?!"

Yuri inhaled sharply, finally shooting a successful glare at the older man. "Quit joking around! I'll punch you, I swear I will!"

"Sorry, Sorry, just trying to lighten the mood." Viktor laughed but the humor died in his voice quickly and before long, he wore a serious countenance—one that made Yuri clamp his mouth shut tightly. "But that's what your feeling for Otabek, isn't it? Agape?"

Yuri didn't want to believe it was that but the possibility existed. Just imagining the other's face, Otabek's smile which he's only ever reserved for his family and Yuri—it made his chest tighten and breath short. Sure, the hero of Kazakhstan was polite—nice depending on whom he was talking to but towards Yuri… He bit his lip, thinking about all the times they spent together, hugging his waist tightly as Otabek drove his Harley on the road with speed, the times they stayed up late just talking (whether it was on the phone, facetime, Skype or at a late night café), and when he was cold, Yuri would always be enveloped in the warmth of the other's thick jacket or scarf…

Pulling his legs up to his chest, Yuri pressed his face against the tops of his knees, hiding his expression from Viktor's view as he murmured softly but loud enough for the other to hear him crystal clear. "Is that what it is? Is that what I feel for Otabek?"

Again, Viktor smiled, gratification welling up in his chest. Yuri rarely if ever showed such a vulnerable side and witnessing it always made Viktor hopeful that the blond would learn to open up to him more. Being the oldest, he had a personal obligation to look after the blond—even if Yuri would say otherwise. "I honestly can't answer that for you—that's something only you know…" He explained, watching as Yuri's fingers clenched at the fabric of his jeans tightly.

Yuri was without a doubt, overwhelmed—starting from the beginning of his friendship with Otabek and tracing them to the present, all the while he tried to recognize where the love for his friend began. It was confusing, he concluded. It couldn't just happen out of thin air, could it? He needed help, he decided almost bitterly. And much to his chagrin, Viktor was the only one capable of being able to explain the mess he was experiencing emotionally (literally, he had no choice). Yuri could only pray that the fool would be less cryptic about enlightening him about love.

With a heavy sigh, he took a deep breath. "When did you know that you were in love with Yuuri?" He finally asked, and then seeing the way Viktor's eyes softened at the question, suddenly reminded Yuri of the way Otabek would look at him from time to time when the other thought he wouldn't notice. Was that what love looked like?

"I supposed it started with infatuation, or rather love at first sight during that banquet years ago." Remembering that drunken night, Yuri visibly shuddered but Viktor simply ignored his reaction with the roll of his eyes. "I just had this feeling—I was attracted to him from the start but obviously it took time for the same feelings to be reciprocated. But as we got to know each other more and our relationship as coach and student grew, I just couldn't contain myself from professing my love for him and his determination to succeed." He explained in detail, the look on his face starry eyed and dreamy.

"But Yuri, you didn't fall in love as fast as I did. Instead you cultivated it, loved him slowly and now it's essentially bloomed." Viktor said, his expression shifting but full of pride which Yuri couldn't begin to describe. "And that, I believe is just as beautiful as my love story. After all, it's hard to forget how the hero of Kazakhstan kidnapped the fairy of Russia one fine day off the streets of Barcelona three years ago." He added with a wink.

It's funny, how most people would say the city of love was Paris, but for Yuri—it must have begun in Barcelona, he concluded with a shaky smile. His memories of their time together there filled his mind, the warm sensation of those recollections essentially flooding his being with a joy he couldn't even begin to explain in words. But Viktor understood—he understood that better than anyone he knew.

Yuri now yearned for Otabek's presence more than anything, his cheeks flushing at the thought. And damn it, the guy was on his way… As luck would have it, his ringtone went off, and Yuri just about screamed with fright until he realized it was his own phone. Scrambling for the device in his pocket, he froze at the sight of Otabek's name on the screen but accepted the call none the less, his voice frantic.

"H—Hello!" He exclaimed.

"Yuri, I just landed."

Otabek's voice was deep and familiar, finally hearing him speak made Yuri's heart race and immediately he stood up from the floor on shaky legs. "You're finally here?"

"Well, I just got off the plane—heading towards security but I'll be at the entrance soon."

Yuri didn't want to imagine that Otabek was just as excited as he was. He couldn't be—he didn't even know that Yuri was in love with him and nothing could top that. "Okay, I'll be waiting as soon as you get out!"

There was a pause, and then a soft chuckle on the line. Yuri pictured that Otabek was smiling and his breath hitched. "Kay, I look forward to finally seeing you again, Yuri."

With those last words, their call ended, and slowly Yuri pocketed his phone again, his expression in a daze. Otabek was finally here, in the same building. Soon they would see each other, and Yuri knew for sure his heart would explode with how full it felt (not like it wasn't already on the verge of doing just that).

Still sitting on the ground next to him, Viktor got up slowly, dusting his pants off as soon as he stood up straight. The look of endearment he wore for the blond was apparent, but Yuri didn't see this. Of course Viktor didn't mind in the least, after all—he only just now realized how deeply in love he was.

"So, I take it he's finally here, huh?"

"Yeah…"

"And what are you going to do?"

"Tell him I love him."

"I see." Viktor replied at first, however, he had to stop suddenly and think about Yuri's words carefully and he no sooner sent him a perplexed look. "Wow, isn't that a little sudden?!" He exclaimed.

Yuri glared at him though, his blood pressure on the rise. "Don't be a hypocrite! You weren't exactly subtle with how you told Yuuri you loved him either! And I'm not the one that went and tackled their partner on the ice after their free skate only to kiss them during a live stream for the whole world to see at the Grand Prix Series in China!"

"Oh yeah, that did happen!" Viktor laughed out loud, unashamed.

Yuri barked. "Stupid old man!"

"But this stupid old man helped you towards the right direction, didn't he?" Viktor asked with a slight smirk, mischief twinkling in his eyes.

Yuri of course returned the same gaze. "Yeah, but so what? You're still stupid…" He said, turning on his heel. "But thank you anyways…"

"You're welcome, Yurochka." Viktor replied, his hand reaching out to grasp the blonde's shoulder as he squeezed it tightly. "Now go get him, tiger—you know where we'll be waiting for you."

X

X

Yuri ran as fast as he could to the intersection of the airport. It was where he would have the highest chance of finding Otabek first. He didn't know how much longer he could wait and he took out his phone, fingers working to find his call log as he pressed Otabek's name. Once the line began to ring, he brought the phone up to his ear, waiting in anticipation. Five rings later, Otabek finally picked up the call and Yuri released a sigh in relief.

"H—Hey, are you done at security?"

"Yeah, I'm on my way now." Otabek replied. "Yuri, you sound a little out of breath, are you alright?"

Was he alright? No, he most certainly was not alright! And Yuri said just that. "No I'm not!" He shouted, the loudness of his voice so unexpected that even Otabek had to tear his phone away from his ear. "I miss you! And I want to see you so badly it hurts!" He screamed into the speaker, unable to stop himself now. "I hate waiting! I hate it so much—like waiting for my mom to see me skate on the ice and when I waited for Viktor to keep his promise but even then he forgot about me—but with you, I don't know why I can wait for you even though it still hurts for me to do!"

"Yuri—"

"You always pulled through somehow, never disappointing me even though I still have doubts that one day you will…" Yuri tried to explain but it seemed as though his mind was scattered, unable to choose the right words so he couldn't help that what he was saying was becoming a mess of sorts. "But waiting for you today, Beka, I think I'm in love with you and it took me this long to realize it…"

Silence followed after his confession, and it frightened Yuri considerably. What was Otabek thinking? He must be shocked; there was no doubt in Yuri's mind. He didn't want to believe Otabek would think of him differently, let alone conceive anything further than that and Yuri tried to choke back a sob. This was stupid, he wasn't a cry baby, not like Yuuri was but with how overwhelmed he was feeling—confessing the way he did, it couldn't be helped.

Finally, after that long, agonizing pause, Yuri heard Otabek's voice return. "Yuri—again…"

His eyes widened instantly. "Huh?"

"Say it again, but not on the phone." Otabek said, and his voice carried, not just through the receiver but Yuri could hear him in the same space.

Looking up from the ground, standing at least ten feet away from him, Yuri found himself meeting the older man's gaze and there was something there that made his heart swell up ten times bigger than it was. Ah, this had to be it. It had to be Agape—unconditional love…

"Please, again, tell me you love me one more time." He repeated before disconnecting the call completely but his eyes remained on nothing else but Yuri.

All Yuri could do was stare back; the hand holding his phone slowly falling to his side. What now? What would Viktor do?! What would Yuuri do?! His mind screamed but he couldn't decide. They were irrational—but then so was he and Yuri kind of hated how he wasn't too far behind from following in their very footsteps. Growling—Yuri shoved his phone in his pocket, his green eyes bright, narrowed but watering as he sprinted forward.

Otabek saw the tackle coming a mile away but didn't resist as he dropped his luggage behind him and stood with open arms. As soon as Yuri threw himself forward and wrapped his arms around his neck, Otabek felt the blonde's lips press against his own. The pair predictably enough, fell backwards but they didn't care, their arms still held tightly around each other. Yuri pecked his lips several times and Otabek smiled into each kiss, meeting them each and every time. When the contact stopped and he opened his eyes again, he was met with green sparkling orbs, the likes of which he'd never seen before and yet they were the most beautiful thing in the world to him in that very moment.

"A long time ago, when Viktor first trained me to skate to Agape, I didn't understand what the feeling meant. The closet thing I could feel to it was the love I had for my grandpa—and I almost grasped it but it still wasn't enough." Yuri explained his voice remarkably soft. "But then, you appeared out of nowhere in Barcelona, like some stupid knight in shining armor and thinking about it, Agape is like Yavok and Lilia's dedication to coach me, the way Viktor would look at katsudon with his stupid lovey dovey eyes or how Yuko cared about me and would listen to me complain… and then you, how you climbed your way up to the ranks until we stood on the same ground, remembering my eyes… you're my Agape too… and I love you…"

The look of wonder, the softness in Otabek's gaze was everything Yuri could have hoped for and more. When he reached up to cup his cheek, Yuri pressed back into the warm touch, closing his eyes. "This isn't a dream, is it?" Otabek asked his voice unsure.

Yuri, the little devil turned his head inward, closer to Otabek's thumb until he caught it in his mouth and bit down on the flesh without hesitation. The older skater gasped from the shock and when Yuri let go, he licked at the wound he'd inflicted, his eyes glinting as he began to smirk. "You bet your ass this isn't a dream."

Otabek's bitten hand went around until it was settled on the back of Yuri's neck. "That's good to know. And by the way, I love you too, Yuri Plisetsky. All this time, I've loved you." He confessed before pulling Yuri's face back down for another kiss. This time deeper than the first and he felt Yuri moan against his mouth and kiss him back.

No sooner did they begin making out, concerned airport workers to their embarrassment had to usher them off their floor, forcing them to return to their awaiting party near the entrance. It took a matter of minutes to discover, but to everyone's shock and horror, Axel, Lutz and Loop had live streamed the new couple's public confession on YouTube and Yuri's social media accounts in particular exploded with fans of both skaters all over the world as well as news anchors reacting to their new relationship status.

Ahh, life was certainly turning into a field day and Yuri cursed fate and all the above for having made similar decisions like one Viktor Nikiforov and Yuuri Katsuki did three years ago.


End file.
